Cheeky Monkey wrote: ↑Mon Jan 04, 2021 9:57 pm You really are charm personified aren't you

He's a mental health nurse... It's ok for him to be like that. We allow it in our field

Cheeky Monkey wrote: ↑Mon Jan 04, 2021 9:57 pm You really are charm personified aren't you

But hold on, the poem on the first page was all about 'people' pushing the rules and how we all tutted about these fictional nobjockeys pushing the boundaries, and had a page and a half of how people should not do that.

Then Reg says 'hey let's all go for a ride anyway, it will be fine if you take some sanitiser'.

You are quite right, at times I may not be charm personified, but please take some time to explain how my verse would not fit in to the original poem, apart from I used your mate as a subject. I could reasonably be described as right in the front line of this crap for the last 9 months, thankfully I am now a step removed, it was really hard work.

Scrap the bloody VRT thing, follow the rules, and don't push the boundaries, otherwise you are simply another verse in the poem.

Cheddar Man wrote: ↑Mon Jan 04, 2021 10:06 pm

Cheeky Monkey wrote: ↑Mon Jan 04, 2021 9:57 pm You really are charm personified aren't you

But hold on, the poem on the first page was all about 'people' pushing the rules and how we all tutted about these fictional nobjockeys pushing the boundaries, and had a page and a half of how people should not do that.

Then Reg says 'hey let's all go for a ride anyway, it will be fine if you take some sanitiser'.

You are quite right, at times I may not be charm personified, but please take some time to explain how my verse would not fit in to the original poem, apart from I used your mate as a subject. I could reasonably be described as right in the front line of this crap for the last 9 months, thankfully I am now a step removed, it was really hard work.

Scrap the bloody VRT thing, follow the rules, and don't push the boundaries, otherwise you are simply another verse in the poem.

Sorry Grant... I'm just gonna make this observation based on months of obsevation. You're just not a very nice man at all. Apologies to offend. Take care

Here we go again

redefined_cycles wrote: ↑Mon Jan 04, 2021 10:09 pm

Cheddar Man wrote: ↑Mon Jan 04, 2021 10:06 pm

Cheeky Monkey wrote: ↑Mon Jan 04, 2021 9:57 pm You really are charm personified aren't you

But hold on, the poem on the first page was all about 'people' pushing the rules and how we all tutted about these fictional nobjockeys pushing the boundaries, and had a page and a half of how people should not do that.

Then Reg says 'hey let's all go for a ride anyway, it will be fine if you take some sanitiser'.

You are quite right, at times I may not be charm personified, but please take some time to explain how my verse would not fit in to the original poem, apart from I used your mate as a subject. I could reasonably be described as right in the front line of this crap for the last 9 months, thankfully I am now a step removed, it was really hard work.

Scrap the bloody VRT thing, follow the rules, and don't push the boundaries, otherwise you are simply another verse in the poem.

Sorry Grant... I'm just gonna make this observation based on months of obsevation. You're just not a very nice man at all. Apologies to offend. Take care

Hey, that is ok Shaf. No offence taken at all, have a wonderful evening, and stay safe on the wards.

Cheddar Man wrote: ↑Mon Jan 04, 2021 10:06 pm ...but please take some time to explain how my verse would not fit in to the original poem...

The poem described attitudes of wilful non-compliance.
Reg proposed a method of what he believed to be responsible compliance with the tier 4 rules and guidance implemented prior to the PM's lockdown 3 announcement .

Cheeky Monkey wrote: ↑Mon Jan 04, 2021 4:09 pm

Chocolate, strawberries and marshmallows - the delicious alternative to a panda .

Scurries of to the todays ride and BAM threads to see who is advising followng the rules and what they actually did

Cheddar Man wrote: ↑Mon Jan 04, 2021 9:54 pm
They missed a verse from the poem on the first page......

My name is Reggie Regson
I like to ride my bike
I’ll do it despite the Tiers
Boris can take a hike
I used to sleep in ditches
Now it’s in my garden shed
But it isn’t irresponsible I’ve decided
I’ve done the science in my head

That's quite amusing but doesn't really fit into the poem in the OP because this character seems to have learnt the lesson of his wicked ways and decided that staying at home in his garden shed is more responsible

I was however nearly offended on behalf of 'Our Reg' when he was subsequently likened to being a "fictional nobjockey", I was even going to get flyers and placards made up with "Our Reg is a Real Character" printed on them and march up and down the Cheddar Gorge in protest but I thought 'hang on a moment, would our Reg actually be offended at being a fictional nobjockey...? Maybe a modern day Flesh Gordon for example?' (ask ya mum, kids - no, wait... probably best ask ya dad ). Imagine the notoriety

Lazarus wrote: ↑Tue Jan 05, 2021 8:38 pm Scurries of to the todays ride and BAM threads to see who is advising followng the rules and what they actually did

Naughty

The British Mountaineering Council (BMC) have just issued some guidance for England which suggests I can only exercise within the limits of my village. Not sure what that means in reality - Parish Council boundary ?

It's a very active Peak District village (Chinley) - full of cyclists, walkers and fell runners. I would have thought better for them to be spread out in the Peak hills that can be accessed from our doorsteps than squashed onto the park, community centre playing field or village green.

https://www.thebmc.co.uk/covid19-latest ... in-england

EDIT: Re-reading it perhaps they are saying that I should only travel to start the exercise within the village rather than how far I travel doing the exercise. In practice for me there would be no travel anyway as I can start/finish my exercise at the doorstep.

psling wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 11:17 am

Cheddar Man wrote: ↑Mon Jan 04, 2021 9:54 pm
They missed a verse from the poem on the first page......

My name is Reggie Regson
I like to ride my bike
I’ll do it despite the Tiers
Boris can take a hike
I used to sleep in ditches
Now it’s in my garden shed
But it isn’t irresponsible I’ve decided
I’ve done the science in my head

That's quite amusing but doesn't really fit into the poem in the OP because this character seems to have learnt the lesson of his wicked ways and decided that staying at home in his garden shed is more responsible

I was however nearly offended on behalf of 'Our Reg' when he was subsequently likened to being a "fictional nobjockey", I was even going to get flyers and placards made up with "Our Reg is a Real Character" printed on them and march up and down the Cheddar Gorge in protest but I thought 'hang on a moment, would our Reg actually be offended at being a fictional nobjockey...? Maybe a modern day Flesh Gordon for example?' (ask ya mum, kids - no, wait... probably best ask ya dad ). Imagine the notoriety

Lazarus wrote: ↑Tue Jan 05, 2021 8:38 pm Scurries of to the todays ride and BAM threads to see who is advising followng the rules and what they actually did

Naughty

I get the Flesh Gordon reference, I went to watch it in our local cinema, and paid extra to get upstairs with the other 'grown ups', although I think the average age would still have been just under 15 3/4.

Anyway, your march up Cheddar Gorge, the deepest natural limestone gorge in the UK (although I don't know why they market it like that, to me it makes it sound like there is a deeper one somewhere, but it is man-made) would breach current lockdown rules, even if you cycled there and mean that you would be subject to a verse of the poem..........

My name is Simon Psling
I enjoy a good protest
I tried to free the Renault Five
By wearing nothing but a vest
I intend to go to Cheddar Gorge
To show my anger at CheddarMan
I may spread Corona far and wide
But Reg will know I'm his biggest fan

Bloody hell this is getting a bit posh now isn't it!?!? Tea pots for proper tea and taking the pi55 in verse feeling very inadequate now

AndreR wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 12:36 pm Bloody hell this is getting a bit posh now isn't it!?!? Tea pots for proper tea and taking the pi55 in verse feeling very inadequate now

It's a chocolate teapot. It's chuffing useless

Cheeky Monkey wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 12:41 pm

AndreR wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 12:36 pm Bloody hell this is getting a bit posh now isn't it!?!? Tea pots for proper tea and taking the pi55 in verse feeling very inadequate now

It's a chocolate teapot. It's chuffing useless

I disagree on the usefulness of a chocolate teapot. While it's not very useful for it's primary purpose, it can at least still be eaten*.

*as long as you eat it before trying to make tea in it

PaulB2 wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 12:57 pm

Cheeky Monkey wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 12:41 pm

AndreR wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 12:36 pm Bloody hell this is getting a bit posh now isn't it!?!? Tea pots for proper tea and taking the pi55 in verse feeling very inadequate now

It's a chocolate teapot. It's chuffing useless

I disagree on the usefulness of a chocolate teapot. While it's not very useful for it's primary purpose, it can at least still be eaten*.

*as long as you eat it before trying to make tea in it

Y'know what goes lovely with a nice bit of choccy? A nice cuppa tea. But you can't have one BECAUSE THAT TEAPOT IS BLOODY USELESS!!!!!!!!

Cheeky Monkey wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 12:41 pm

AndreR wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 12:36 pm Bloody hell this is getting a bit posh now isn't it!?!? Tea pots for proper tea and taking the pi55 in verse feeling very inadequate now

It's a chocolate teapot. It's chuffing useless

But it's very well used / useful as a simile? Now I'm confusing myself.

Anyway.. I stand with Reg and all who sleep in their gardens after a ride that is local in principle

jameso wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 1:49 pm

Cheeky Monkey wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 12:41 pm

AndreR wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 12:36 pm Bloody hell this is getting a bit posh now isn't it!?!? Tea pots for proper tea and taking the pi55 in verse feeling very inadequate now

It's a chocolate teapot. It's chuffing useless

But it's very well used / useful as a simile? Now I'm confusing myself.
...

Damn you

Gotta love a bit of highbrow.

My name is Normy Bollockchops
I dearly love my bike
I push it up big mountain sides
And take it for a hike.

I have no care
when people stare
And question what I do
For they're the ones behind the bars
And living in a zoo.

I have no debt
Or deep regret
My path is paved with gold
I'll do this sh!t
Until I'm told
That you are now too old.

Come the day
They'll find me dead
Lay beneath the pines
But leave me there
Without a care
To ride just one last time.

EDIT: Matt's added a final verse, which I think finishes it off nicely.

Come the day
I find you dead
Laying in that furrow
I will not stop
I’ll bunnyhop your head
‘Cos my skills are just so ‘duro

Bearbonesnorm wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 1:57 pm Gotta love a bit of highbrow.

My name is Normy Bollockchops
I dearly love my bike
I push it up big mountain sides
And take it for a hike.

I have no care
when people stare
And question what I do
For they're the ones behind the bars
And living in a zoo.

I have no debt
Or deep regret
My path is paved with gold
I'll do this sh!t
Until I'm told
That you are now too old.

Come the day
They'll find me dead
Lay beneath the pines
But leave me there
Without a care
To ride just one last time.

I can nearly hear Glen Campbell singing that to the tune of Rhinestone Cowboy I'll go and do some work now...

Bearbonesnorm wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 1:57 pm I'll do this sh!t
Until I'm told
That you are now too old.

Somehow, I can't quite picture you taking much notice of such pronouncements...

AndreR wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 2:35 pm

Bearbonesnorm wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 1:57 pm
My name is Normy Bollockchops
I dearly love my bike
I push it up big mountain sides
And take it for a hike.
.....

I can nearly hear Glen Campbell singing that to the tune of Rhinestone Cowboy I'll go and do some work now...

I'm seeing it more as a Toy Dolls ditty

Just needs a nice chorus adding in....

My name is not really CheddarMan
I don't have Netflix or Sky
I often go up and down the Gorge
You'll see me flying by
I'm on here under a pseudonym
And rub people the wrong way
But I don't care if I ruffle feathers
Often it's what others would like to say

This is just an internet forum
For people who ride bikes
Some on, some off road
You can ride wherever you loikes
Cheeky has taken a dislike to me
Clearly Shaf has too
I guess there others in the same boat
I really don't give a poo

There are lots of questions
Asked on here
Which tyre, saddle or tarp
Which sleeping bag, shoes or beer
No-one really listens though
The answers are fixed in our head
And most of the time the person will go
For whatever 5hit is in their shed

So keep on having a pop at me
I will keep on pointing your errors
Your inconsistent responses
And the unfathomable nightime terrors
No apology will I ever give
For rubbing you up the wrong way
You can post up pictures of pandas but still
I look forward to meeting you all one day

RIP wrote: ↑Wed Jan 06, 2021 3:11 pm Just needs a nice chorus adding in....