White, 2 ply. Brand new

1x roll for £5

3x rolls for £10

P+P £3 for tracking delivery...

I'm told tinned tomatoes are the new gold dust.

Bin bags. Big ones. Get them now.

Every apocalypse I've seen has rubbish piled up in the streets. Let's not be like that.

(two per corpse I reckon)

voodoo_simon wrote: ↑Mon Mar 16, 2020 1:20 pm White, 2 ply. Brand new

1x roll for £5

3x rolls for £10

P+P £3 for tracking delivery...

Is it reusable or tls type?

Willing to swap for
1) nappies
2) paracetamol
3) UHT milk - FFS they even sold out of the soya as folk were buying it just because its UHT - their tatse buds are in for as shock
4) pasta

Been meaning to make a 'did you know' thread but then held back

Anyway, did you know that muslims (oh gosh, here he goes again) use water (similar to what Dave did on the Divide but whilst actually still sat on loo... some places even have bidets but their posh ) as a matter of obliatory/obligation. I think alot of asian countries might also have similar but can't really say I know for sure.

Its a clean hand (right to hold water jug/bottle) and dirty hand (left to wash bits) technique... not sure if that might help some but apparently it's good for ITTs aswell

Not sure if that'll cause Salsa-Simon (see what I did there ) to drop his prices a little...

NB. Doesn't mean you'd not use tissue but alot less of it (we're in special measures/restrictions at hone from the missus/their mum)...

Vaseline in lieu of bog roll. Apply it pre-emptively.

May have to dig some holes in the garden.

My bog roll avoidance trick is to eat lots of peanuts, it comes out a Treet. I'm here all week, and next week as we're under house arrest.

redefined_cycles wrote: ↑Mon Mar 16, 2020 2:42 pm Been meaning to make a 'did you know' thread but then held back

Anyway, did you know that muslims (oh gosh, here he goes again) use water (similar to what Dave did on the Divide but whilst actually still sat on loo... some places even have bidets but their posh ) as a matter of obliatory/obligation. I think alot of asian countries might also have similar but can't really say I know for sure.

Its a clean hand (right to hold water jug/bottle) and dirty hand (left to wash bits) technique... not sure if that might help some but apparently it's good for ITTs aswell

I do it at home as well. Don't tell Helen. Only way to feel properly clean and not have to restort to the "clag gone" in the basement

Dave Barter wrote: ↑Mon Mar 16, 2020 3:42 pm "clag gone"

Superb reference..!

Bearbonesnorm wrote: ↑Mon Mar 16, 2020 1:50 pm I'm told tinned tomatoes are the new gold dust.

Fight/spat seen in Tesco over the last 4 pack the other day

You know why people are buying up the loo roll, don't you? It's because every time someone sneezes, 1000 people sh!t themselves.

Well, I've got 10 rolls of loo roll, 3 dozen back copies of Old Bike Mart and a lot of books so I'm fair set up for the rest of the year...

Hey up Shaf !

Since my world travels when I was 27, and at least 2 months round India (and 3 months + coming back two and a half years later) I’ve not used toilet paper (except one sheet just for drying).

It is very hygienic.

Using toilet paper leaves traces of the stuff on yer arse, so it’s definitely sub-standard, unless you’re posh and have a bidet....

I can’t believe any Bearbones tramps have bidets.....

ericrobo wrote: ↑Tue Mar 17, 2020 11:19 am Hey up Shaf !

Since my world travels when I was 27, and at least 2 months round India (and 3 months + coming back two and a half years later) I’ve not used toilet paper (except one sheet just for drying).

It is very hygienic.

Using toilet paper leaves traces of the stuff on yer arse, so it’s definitely sub-standard, unless you’re posh and have a bidet....

I can’t believe any Bearbones tramps have bidets.....

Haha... well done and glad its not me and Dave on here that washes our bottoms (clean bottom, happy life ). Bidets.. Yeah thats proper posh. I find a 1L trpicana bottle works for us and every few months we just get a new bottle (of a similar juice)...

Theres actually something more posh than a bidet (like a toilet but throws water at yer bottom instead). Saw it somewhere once next to the toilet (think it was either at a posh mates house or the disabled toilets of a masjid) and took me ages to figure out what it was...

Dave, if you wanter to upgrade to it then I can find you a reference (so you can say the nursing book says that its good to wash the bum for infection control purposes to Helen and hep fuel the argument for it... it might be a bit spendy) out of the Royal Marsden Manual of Nursing Procedures when I gets home

I can’t believe any Bearbones tramps have bidets.....

Following a thread over on the Guardian it turns out they are also known as bum guns.

Be careful out there. I suspect we could see a new dawn of the Bottom Inspectors

Went to Tesco today (to buy lunch items), and it was pretty busy and the queues at the checkouts not social distancing. I saw in someone's trolley they had four large packets of serviettes. I'm guessing it wasn't for a dinner party. And it'll clog up their bog too.

Mariner wrote: ↑Tue Mar 17, 2020 3:15 pm

I can’t believe any Bearbones tramps have bidets.....

Following a thread over on the Guardian it turns out they are also known as bum guns.

Biffin Shower?

TheBrownDog wrote: ↑Mon Mar 16, 2020 8:58 pm You know why people are buying up the loo roll, don't you? It's because every time someone sneezes, 1000 people sh!t themselves.