Pin-pointing pointlessness is the pinnacle of pleasure

[benconnolli]

I have an obsessive love for problem solving that I take to the ridiculous extreme of creating problems precisely in order to solve them. Back when exercise restrictions were eased from once a day for an hour to unlimited, I set myself something big. I was to cycle all of the chevrons on my local OS map.

Passing all of these points was the objective of the ride, but that was not its purpose. Being furloughed I had an easy life, free from challenges. I had to complete this arbitrary task to remind myself that I could, and how good discomfort could be. I settled on this in particular as it remained relatively close to home for self sufficiency in disaster and also sunk plenty of time in the preparation, incorporating some mental effort too.

First step was to lay out the map and mark on all the chevrons. I finally had a use for all those brake washers and bits and bobs that I hoard "just in case" to landmark each point to visit. I had committed to this goal before I was aware of the true scale of it. My map had 33 chevrons with no escaping the distance. Gulp, this was turning into a huge day out. That was sort of the point. I needed to prove to myself that I was able to do hard things.

Organisation is not something I pride myself on, but I have to admit I rather enjoyed it. I am aware of the rosy tint on my glasses, but I miss my job. I am a software engineer and had been working on a path finding optimization algorithm for our Coordinate Measuring Machines to automatically measure the features from a CAD file. My solution for this cycling route had the additional softer restrictions of nicer roads and limited doubling back so deviated from pure maths, an engineering answer. Final plan was somewhat irrelevant as I always ride with my head in the clouds so ended up using the paper map to reroute on the fly.

Right from the first pedal stroke I was beaming. Today was simple; today felt free. I glided weightlessly along the lanes, my enthusiasm acting as a tailwind. I had snapped the lockdown chains that shackled me to my house, there was nothing holding me back.

As the sun rose and the world woke up I felt something I had not felt in a long time; hunger. It is such a primal instinct, but easily lost in cushy modern life. The food tasted so much better because I needed it,
rather than wanting it. I was genuinely appreciative.

Something obvious in reflection, that I had not considered, was what a physical rollercoaster this ride would be. Each chevron is a road that contains one section steeper than 8%. This has no requirement for length of climb and my ride was filled with these literal ups and downs. I defy anyone to keep a straight face as the road wooshes you forwards with the gravitational potential energy you just transferred from your legs. Such a simple joy.

In singling out special moments, I am doing an injustice to all the untold tales, but the stand out was at the top of a village. My first chevron after a long roman road, it was steep, it was straight, and it ended with a ford. Full speed ahead on the log flume. I honked my vocal horn and the children splashing squealed with excitement. An excitement I shared. Getting wet feet was so childish and silly but I love that I did it anyway.

Doing long bike rides can feel monotonous. Just turning the pedals. Now this alone is not a criticism; that simple state of being is something special. However, this ride had none of that. Counting down of the chevrons broke it up into manageable sections, a consistent feeling of progress, that achievement I had been yearning for.

I spent all morning looking forward to lunch. Having the luxury of time and restriction on cafes, I had made my own wraps, guacamole, and vegan brownies the previous afternoon. Being totally self-sufficient on this ride added to the liberation. I was able to stop where I wanted, when I wanted. The food lived up to the hype as my internal narrator auditioned for M&S.

By early afternoon the heat had clearly got to my filter as the sound effects started. I made an audible whoosh as the road dipped, neeyoww round swoopy bends, blerogh up the ups. This last one was usually followed by desperate gasping then giggling. I continuously got carried away in the thrill of the hill, pushing way too hard, forgetting that I had thirty three (plus the extra nine due to carefree navigation) to do. I was doing this for my own tormented amusement, not efficiency.

An unavoidable consequence of visiting all the chevrons in a single ride was going round in circles to revisit the valley villages that have four steep roads in and out of. Naturally this repetition happens later on the route when my legs and saddle area were getting rather fed up with this unrelenting cycling. The solution was quite different to the problem as I shoveled some peanut butter flapjacks inside me and got back on my
way.

Simply difficult would be my two word summary of long bike rides. There is a significant distinction between simple and easy. Both can be positives, as can their opposites. Autoplay Netflix is both, knitting a tea cosy is complicated and easy, long bike rides are simply difficult. All you do all day is simply ride your bike, but there is nothing easy about riding all day long.

On the familiar roll home I reflected on whether this had been my most productive day or my least. On the one hand I had cycled a long way, seen lots of interesting things, and experienced living. On the other hand, I had spent almost an entire day prepping the route and the cacophony of snacks, another floppy day after in service of this one simple activity. At the end of it all I was back where I started. I concluded that productivity was not the pinnacle of life.

*I'm super tired at the moment but have some neat pictures to accompany this as well as it was formatted for Ariveé the audax club members magazine. Will post when have capacity.

[thenorthwind]

Cheers Ben

I have it next to the sofa and my phone with Dropbox set to auto-upload photos, so I thought it might as well add these. Hope that's OK!

[sean_iow]

I enjoyed that riding all the chevrons is a genius Idea, I think I'll do that for the Island, I needed some inspiration to get out.

Also reminds me of when Jane and myself first went to Scotland in the 1 litre Yaris, I was working out where to go on the map and said perhaps not that road as it might be a bit steep of a climb for the little engine, Jane asked how I knew it was a steep uphill? I said it had 2 chevrons, she then asked.....

What's the symbol for a steep downhill

[redefined_cycles]

What a good idea. Lemme get my OS map out and give it a count... Well done Ben

[psling]

Great read Ben
And if I remember correctly, you live in the Stroud area? If you're going to do chevrons I can think of few more challenging areas, the hills are many and steep !

[RIP]

Quite wonderfully mad as usual of course .

'Guacamole and brownie wrap' - Heston eat your heart out! (*)

(*) Another one for Heston - 'human heart wrap'?

[psling]

Quite wonderfully mad as usual of course .

'Guacamole and brownie wrap' - Heston eat your heart out! (*)

(*) Another one for Heston - 'human heart wrap'?

The bit I had to read twice was this: ... and saddle area were getting rather fed up with this unrelenting cycling. The solution was quite different to the problem as I shoveled some peanut butter flapjacks inside me and got back on my way.

[redefined_cycles]

What a good idea. Lemme get my OS map out and give it a count... Well done Ben

Map 288... I've counted 73... I don't think I wanna play this game anymore...

[thenorthwind]

The bit I had to read twice was this: ... and saddle area were getting rather fed up with this unrelenting cycling. The solution was quite different to the problem as I shoveled some peanut butter flapjacks inside me and got back on my way.

Peanut butter is a surprisingly good lubricant

[Bearbonesnorm]

Peanut butter is a surprisingly good lubricant

I'm assuming not crunchy?

[benconnolli]

I enjoyed that riding all the chevrons is a genius Idea, I think I'll do that for the Island, I needed some inspiration to get out.

Nice. Super glad I could be of assistance.

'Guacamole and brownie wrap' - Heston eat your heart out! (*)

It's got the killer combo of chilli and chocolate, with the forgiving smooth texture of the avocado covering up my baking shortcomings.

The bit I had to read twice was this: ... and saddle area were getting rather fed up with this unrelenting cycling. The solution was quite different to the problem as I shoveled some peanut butter flapjacks inside me and got back on my way.

that hadn't even crossed my mind. I knew what I meant.

Giving this concept a review rather than a report, it's great if you are yearning for that sense if achievement, but if you want to explore your local area in a new and interesting way, split it up into several rides. The doubling back either literally, or in a loop got tedious and broke that feeling of momentum that long rides can provide.

That said, whenever I move to a new map, I'm going to ignore my own advice and keep this tradition alive, precisely because it's a bit daft.

[BigdummySteve]

Ben, don’t ever move to Cornwall. I’d cycled all the way from John’O’ on my Bigdummy and seen a few hills It’s a place of unrelenting short but very steep hills. You have to be a special person to enjoy it.

[sean_iow]

What are the criteria for the OS to put a chevron on a road? On the 1:25k of the Island there are roads which I'm sure are steep enough but don't have them? Is there another requirement other than gradient, class of road perhaps?

[redefined_cycles]

What are the criteria for the OS to put a chevron on a road? On the 1:25k of the Island there are roads which I'm sure are steep enough but don't have them? Is there another requirement other than gradient, class of road perhaps?

AFAIK they need to have a minimal amount of climbing per x amount of distance. Plus, many of the signs that state 25% gradient or less/more are incorrect and need revising (according to what I read in Simon Warrens book or Tejvan the HillClimbers blog)...

How many chevrons have you found on your local 1 in 25 map please Sean?

[redefined_cycles]

Classing doubles as 2 separate entities (just so I can compare with OS 288

[sean_iow]

How many chevrons have you found on your local 1 in 25 map please Sean?

I'll have to do a proper count up but a quick scan of the paper map showed 15 locations with a good spread across the Island.

[sean_iow]

Newchurch Shute has a chevron and is 5% and 0.3 miles long on the Strava segment, the road sign says 16% so that must be the steep kick at the top.

Culver doesn't get a chevron, it's 8.4% for 0.36 miles on Strava but I don't think there's a road sign, it's a dead end, albeit a wide and busy one. Maybe that's the reason for the lack of chevron? Both are tough climbs on the singlespeed.

[whitestone]

Hmm, 26 without going across any of the enclosing main roads

Do the rules allow you to nip a short way down a road to pick up a chevron on the return climb or do you have to do the road in its entirety?

[redefined_cycles]

Hmm, 26 without going across any of the enclosing main roads

Do the rules allow you to nip a short way down a road to pick up a chevron on the return climb or do you have to do the road in its entirety?

Don't think there are any rules Bob... Clues in the title I think. I'm just gonna ensure I've been over the road (up or down it) with the chevron on it at the gridpoint of the exact chevron. Good idea about doubling back though as I hadn't thought of that. Might make my ride a bit easier.

Sure Ben will be along shortly to clarify or state if he had a different ethos...

[redefined_cycles]

Newchurch Shute has a chevron and is 5% and 0.3 miles long on the Strava segment, the road sign says 16% so that must be the steep kick at the top.

Culver doesn't get a chevron, it's 8.4% for 0.36 miles on Strava but I don't think there's a road sign, it's a dead end, albeit a wide and busy one. Maybe that's the reason for the lack of chevron? Both are tough climbs on the singlespeed.

Personally I reckon its just where they messed up slightly with elevations. Might explain why Simon Warren didn't actually use chevrons as his source of identifying the climbs for his book. Interesting stuff... Like you said, angthing with Chevrons is hard regardless (SS or not, for me)..

[Dave Barter]

OS chevrons are surveyed on the ground.

Strava gradients are derived from GPS and DEM data. The former is much more accurate. I know as I attempted to create my own UK data set of chevrons from height data (https://github.com/nautoguide/gradient_markers) it is a tricky problem.

I need to do some analysis but I'm fairly confident that Devon/Cornwall will be the most chevrontastic areas in the UK

Simon Warren rightly used cyclists and knowledge to source the classic road climbs. I know because I interviewed him for an article a few years back. Chevrons don't always point you to the best climbs, contours are better for that.

ps. Really enjoyed the post Ben

[fatbikephil]

Not a huge number on my landranger sheet but spread out over the whole map with a concentration on the well known (hereabouts) Path of Condie 'X'. Good idea though and a great read too

For anyone living in the Yorkshire Dales such a thing would be brutal!

[Bearbonesnorm]

I'm not even going to bother looking.

[ScotRoutes]

12 here. Obvious ones are the climb to Cairngorm, the Lecht and Bridge of Brown. I'm not very tempted to follow your example Ben but have added the few I haven't ridden to next year's to-do list.